No, the battle has just begun. When she said, 'I do' to you, Satan put you both in his crosshairs.
Here's some things I do to fight the good fight.
A thread by @geophf
1. At the end of the day, when your wife says her prayers, does she thank God for you? Every hour of every day, you, fellas, have a choice: to make her thank God for you, or to make her pray to make it today because you made her life harder, sadder, more scared. Do the former.
Today, did you:
- Tell your wife you love her?
- Compliment her in things in which she excels?
- See her as beautiful and tell her why?
- Thank God for the things she does today to keep this family happy, alive, prospering, surviving?
This week, when you go to Church together, when you go to receive communion with her, do you stand with her, and whisper in your heart to God, "I do"?
Do you wonder if she would say "I do" to you this week? Fnd and do things to make her eager to say "I do" to nobody else but you
You have children? No? Pray about this. Don't delay. We couldn't have children for 5 years. Now: children. You have daughters?
Be the man to your daughters that is better than every single man in the whole world. Show them how a gentleman treats a lady in how you treat your wife
The inlaws/'out'laws. You didn't marry your wife: you married your wife's family. Be the son to your inlaws that makes them proud that you are part of the family. Love and respect your inlaws. Make them delighted when you come to visit and sad to see you leave
Every
Single
Time
Dress. When you go out, you dress better than your wife, always. Make her proud of the man attached to her arm: you. Put on your Eph 6 armor, which means, soldier, you stand up and talk with others, listen, share your views. Don't be a drag at the party, be a source of light.
Friends. Your wife is your best friend. Period. You don't have guy friends anymore, and you definitely don't have girl friends. You are for her. You hate to leave her, and are happy to come home. Your other friends are your friends. Your wife is your best friend.
The job. Get a job, start a company, maybe? Do what you do to provide for your family. Here's the rub: you are not your job. You do your job and you be the best person in that company. The absolute best. But why? Because your vocation is your family: you will haul trash for them.
Time. Make time for your wife. Let her talk and listen to her. Find out, again, what she's dealing with today. Find out, again, what her passion is. Get excited about her successes; be there for her failures. Your woman, guys, is saying something to you. Hang on her every word.
Find her language of love, and speak it. You like giving her flowers? Give her flowers. But if she cries when you do the dishes for her, maybe you want to do that, too.
Strike that. Speak her language of love. It's not yours. So what? You love her and you want her to be happy.
Share with her what you are doing. She can read your mind and she knows every single secret of yours. She needs you to say what's on your mind. Do not maroon her in the marriage, no: you are the captain of this ship, so you tell her everything so you sail together to your end.
Plan things as a family, every month. Go to NYC or Rome or build a city (on Rock and Roll). Involve the whole family in the planning, adapt to what excites them, then do it, together. They will look back at these times and say: we did this.
You take care of them, they love you. This is way out of your comfort zone.
You don't have a comfort zone anymore, you have something much more precious: a family.
Now, you: find a cause that's bigger than you, that scares you, and pursue it. Don't die until you're dead. Live.
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